


Pick Me Up

by ddelusionall



Category: JYJ (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Junsu is the bad guy in this, M/M, Minor Character Death, Prostitution, Running Away, Trying to find something better, discussion of abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-17
Updated: 2009-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:07:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23868763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddelusionall/pseuds/ddelusionall
Summary: Jaejoong is driving to the end of his past and toward an uncertain future. Yoochun is walking to a new future and away from a horrible past. They are two strangers, traveling the same road, both hoping to find something that will help them keep on going.
Relationships: Kim Jaejoong/Park Yoochun, Past Jung Yunho/Kim Jaejoong - Relationship
Kudos: 2





	1. Highways

**Author's Note:**

> I am importing my stories from LiveJournal. The original fic can be found [here](http://be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com/).
> 
> I haven't read this story in a long time, so I may have missed some tags. Just let me know if I did.

Kim Jaejoong drove down the road like he owned it. With the amount of money in his various accounts, he probably could afford to buy it, and then widen it. He passed a slower car. Hell, they were all going slower than he was.

An hour into the drive and he wished he’d taken the bullet train. He didn’t have to be in Seoul until Monday. Hey, why not drive?

Another car. He checked traffic, whipped around the older lady and then hit the gas. The radio station went to commercials, and he hit the preset buttons until he came across a song he liked.

Jae had to admit it wasn’t that bad driving. Especially since he was in his brand new, blue Porche Carrera. He wished he had left a bit earlier. Then again, the sun set was pretty. He didn’t get to enjoy sunsets as much as he used to.

His phone vibrated in his pocket. He ignored it. His phone calls were being redirected to his secretary this weekend. Monday was going to suck enough as it was, no need to add stress to his weekend.

He had to slow down again, but cars filed along in the opposite lane as well. He sighed. He just needed to get on the freeway and then he could fly. Man, he should have just flown.

The cars slowed just a bit more. Another sigh.

A lone man walked on the side of the road. A few people honked at him. Jae wondered why he didn’t walk off the road, and then remembered the rain that had hit last night. The ground was probably muddy. He slowed down as he passed, enough to get a look at the guy. Blue jeans wrapped around his body, his hands were shoved into the pockets of a tan sweater with the hood up. A skiff from brown hair blew in the wind.

Jae glanced in his rearview mirror and then made a decision. He always followed his instincts. It’s what made him one of the youngest, richest business men (outside of the entertainment industry) in Korea. His instincts told him to drive to Seoul and now his instincts told him to stop.

He pulled over, pissing off even more cars that had to avoid him on the narrow road. Jae watched the man approach, head down. Jae was sure that he hadn’t even realized someone stopped for him, and the thought was confirmed when the man’s head jerked in surprise.

Attractive, Jae immediately noted, with wide brown eyes and full cheeks. Jae waited until the guy walked along side the car and then he turned around.

“You want a ride somewhere?” he asked.

A shrug. “Sure.”

Jae reached over and opened the door. “Where are you going?” he asked as he climbed in.

“Anywhere but back that way,” he said with a jerk of his head. His voice was low, quiet, but held a feeling of power.

“Running from something?”

“More like getting away from a bad situation.”

Jae checked traffic swerved in front of a car and stepped on the gas. “Lucky you. I’m headed into a bad situation. Put your seatbelt on.”

He was slow to reach for it until Jae swerved around another car, and then he hurried to put it on. “In this car and at this speed, we’ll both be dead if you get an accident.”

“It’s how I drive, man.”

“My name—”

“As long as it’s not Jung Yunho, I don’t really care,” Jae said, and mentally smacked himself for his tone of voice.

The man scoffed.

Jae waved at him in apology. “Sorry. I’m Kim Jaejoong.”

He made a noise and then said, “You’re Kim Jaejoong? I thought you looked familiar.”

Jae smirked. “Heard of me, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“And your name?”

“Micky.” He winced. “Park Yoochun.”

“Micky?”

“It’s a nickname, obviously. One I would prefer not to go by anymore.”

“Just so used to introducing yourself that way.”

“In a sense.”

“Well, I’m going all the way to Seoul, so let me know when you want to get off.”

“You’re driving to Seoul?”

“Yeah, spur of the moment thing. But this Porche was sitting all lonely in my garage, and it didn’t seem fair to fly or take the train when I haven’t even put Siwon through his paces.”

“Siwon?”

“Yep. Cha Siwon.”

“Most guys call their cars girls’ names.”

“Guess it depends on which you prefer riding.”

Yoochun laughed.

“This baby is named after the actor Choi Siwon,” Jaejoong said and ran his hand over the dashboard, “because he’s hot, slick and stylish, and will look good even with mud on him. Oh, and he looks good with his top off.”

Yoochun laughed again and shook his head. “It’s a really nice car.”

“Should we see how fast it goes?”

“Not with that cop in front of you.”

“Shit.” He kept his distance and followed serenely after the officer.

Jae hit the cigarette lighter and then fished out a pack from his jacket pocket. He shook the pack, put the end of a cigarette between his lips and pulled the pack away. He offered the pack to Yoochun. “Do you smoke?”

“Thanks,” Yoochun said and pulled one out. “I haven’t had a cigarette in two days.”

Jae lit his and handed the lighter to Yoochun. Yoochun shut his eyes with the first inhale and then a smile played at his lips. “God, that’s good.”

“It will kill us one day.”

“Your driving will kill us faster.”

Jae laughed. They finished smoking in silence.

Yoochun stifled a yawn.

“Tired?”

“Yeah. I haven’t slept … well, since yesterday.”

“I won’t be offended if you fall asleep.”

“Thanks.”

Silence fell and Jae wasn’t surprised when he looked over and Yoochun was asleep. He hit the highway, and fortunately, the officer didn’t get on with him. He sped for awhile, throwing Siwon into fifth gear. It was easier to keep his thoughts off of Yunho at those speeds. But after a really close call cutting off another car, he slowed down. Adrenaline rushed through his system and it was enough to keep him driving for another couple hours, but as the sky turned black, Jae didn’t want to drive anymore. At the next exit with available lodging, he pulled off the freeway.

The hotel was … quaint. But the sign promised a hearty breakfast. Jae entered the lobby and was greeted formally as Kim Jaejoong-shi. The proprietor bowed and muttered and otherwise annoyed Jae, but he smiled through it.

“I need a room.”

“Of course, sir. Single?”

Jae almost said no, but then smiled a bit. “Yeah.”

“I will put you in room ten.”

Jae pulled out a wad of wons.

“Oh, no, Kim Jaejoong-shi. You don’t have to pay.”

“Yes, I do,” Jae said with a smile. “It’s not fair to spoil me just because of my name.”

“Not just your name, Kim Jaejoong-shi. Your reputation. It would be our honor to host you.”

“I insist,” Jae said, and put the money on the counter and snagged the key from the man’s hand. “I’ll see myself in. Thank you.”

He left, a bit pissed off. These people worshiped him, but still didn’t listen to him. He got back in the car and drove around the building until he came to room ten. He parked, turned the car off and looked over at his sleeping passenger. He nudged him, said his name, but Yoochun didn’t wake up. Jae climbed out of the car and went to the passenger side and opened the door.

“Hey, Yoochun,” he said, nudging him again. “Come on. Wake up. Just long enough to get you into a bed, okay.”

Jae reached around him and undid the seatbelt. That close, a faint whiff of cologne made Jae’s head dizzy. When he pulled on Yoochun’s arms, the other man sort of made a noise.

“Don’t make me smack you,” Jae muttered. He managed to pull Yoochun out of the car, thankful that he made time to exercise. Yoochun made some coherent noise, and then sorta stood up, but Jae knew he was still half asleep.

“Okay, good. Now, walk.” He shuffled them to the door, fought with the room key (an actual key, not a keycard!) and propelled them into the room, barely falling onto the bed. Yoochun shifted in his sleep and wrapped his arms around Jae, face buried into his neck. It’d been a while since Jae had someone so close. He took a deep breath of the hair in his face, smiled but then pushed him away and detangled himself.

“You will not be happy with yourself in the morning if you remember that,” he said to the sleeping man. He rearranged Yoochun on the bed, took off the man’s shoes and then pulled the blanket over him. Jae looked at him for a moment. His eyes jerked with his dreams. He tossed his head, cheeks flushing. Jae thought about waking him up from whatever demons assailed him, but then he settled down. Pouted almost, that plump lower lip shimmering.

Jae shook himself and turned away. He went back to the car and retrieved both of their bags and his laptop case. He went to the bathroom and then changed into sleep pants.

Jae logged onto the computer and deactivated the password. He left it on the table. Keys to the car on the dresser. Money next to it. More money in his pockets.

He had a hunch about this Yoochun guy, and he really hoped the other man proved him wrong.

Jae pulled back the blankets. He curled up on his side, away from Yoochun and tried to relax.

\---***---

 **YOOCHUN**  
  
Yoochun sat up with a sharp intake of breath.

Nightmares. As always. As he slowed his breathing, he realized he had no idea where he was. Soft light filtered into the curtains. A room. A hotel room, based on the smell.

It wasn’t the first time he’d woken up in a strange hotel room with no memory of how he’d gotten there. He did a full body check, testing his limbs and muscles, but other than the injuries he already had, and sore legs from walking all day yesterday, he was okay.

Something shifted on the bed, and Yoochun jumped.

And then he remembered. Kim Jaejoong had picked him up.

Kim Jaejoong was in bed next to him.

He was sharing a bed with fucking Kim Jaejoong.

Yoochun stared at the expanse of skin that was practically glowing in the dim light. Abs, chest, arms. Yoochun licked his lips. Man, this guy’s body was perfect. Yoochun snorted. Everything about him was perfect. Even asleep, his red hair fell over his face the right way. His eyes fluttered, not quite opening. The man’s lips were plump, his teeth white, a rigid jaw line. He probably spent a fortune on personal grooming in a week.

Yoochun very carefully climbed out of bed, wincing as a bit of pain raced up his back.

The first thing he saw was a stack of money on the desk. Without really thinking about it, he picked it up and counted it. He let out a very quiet whistle at the final amount and then put it back. He hit a button on the laptop and when it came to life, showing a homepage without a password, Yoochun knew he’d been set up. The keys to the car were there, and with a smirk, Yoochun dug through Jae’s jeans and found more money. The two suitcases were unlocked. All the clothes in there cost more than everything Yoochun had ever owned.

Jae expected him to rob him. He glanced at the digital clock on the side table. It was three am. He could probably call a taxi and be half way to Seoul before Jaejoong woke up. It was tempting, but he could get to Seoul just the same as if Jae drove him there, and he wouldn’t hate himself in the morning.

He’d still be flat broke in the morning.

Yoochun eyed the money again and then turned away from it. He picked up his bag, and headed to the bathroom. He turned the shower on and stripped down. The welts on his chest were almost healed, but the ones on his back still ached when he stretched in weird directions. He turned around and then looked over his shoulder to see in the mirror. At least he hadn’t been hit so hard that his skin had been cut.

He climbed into the shower, soaking for long minutes. Hot water pummeled his face and head before sliding down his body. He fought the waking nightmares away, the sting of a whip, rough fingers, soothing voices. Yoochun shivered under the spray. He reached the little complimentary soaps, used an entire bottle of shampoo and conditioner on his hair, and an entire bar of soap on his body.

The shower grew cold before he was through.

He used the little hotel towels to dry off and then dug through his bag for his other change of clothes. Clean, dressed and relaxed. Well, as relaxed as he could be. God, he needed a cigarette.

He went back to the main room. Jaejoong was still sleeping. Yoochun dug through his jacket, found the cigarettes and a lighter. He made sure the door was unlocked and then slipped outside. He shivered when his feet hit the cold concrete of the sidewalk. He lit a cigarette.

Now what?

He’d get to Seoul and then … he had no money. No job nor prospects for a job. He’d have to beg work. Yoochun knew he was smart, but he didn’t have the school to back that up. A bit hard to go to school when you were fourteen and homeless. He would never ever go back to Busan though. Ever. He tossed the cigarette butt away and lit another one.

He jumped when the door clicked behind him.

“You steal my cigarettes?” Jae said, voice still groggy from sleep.

“Yeah.” He handed the pack over. Jae took one and lit it. Jae had thrown a jacket over his upper body, but hadn’t zipped it up.

Yoochun looked at that expanse of skin, and then smirked. “You stole my jacket.”

Jae fingered the material and then smiled. “Hm. Just grabbed something on the chair. It’s warm.”

“It looks good on you,” Yoochun said, and then kicked himself for the drop in his voice. Force of habit.

He flicked the butt of the cigarette away in irritation. He went back into the room, sat at the desk and clicked the laptop alive.

The door opened.

Yoochun didn’t look up, but watched Jae move in the corner of his eye. He didn’t take the jacket off as he lay in bed and then looked at him. Jae had said something about heading into a bad situation. Yoochun wondered what he meant, and just for the hell of it googled Jae’s name. Nothing huge came up, just a few charities he belonged to and supported. He clicked “image results” and then swallowed at the pictures that came up. Jae smiling, Jae topless, Jae with some girl, Jae with some guy. He didn’t click on any of them and closed the window. He really wanted to listen to some music, but he left his headphones. If he’d just taken ten minutes to plan he would have been a bit more equipped.

But in ten minutes, he wouldn’t have had the opportunity to slip away.

“You didn’t take anything,” Jae said.

“I’m not a thief,” Yoochun replied.

Silence. “Good. Come back to bed.”

Yoochun glanced at him. There was no malice in those eyes. No lust or pain or anything. Just a bit of exhaustion and intrigue. Jae was trying to figure him out. Yoochun sighed. He shut the laptop screen off, and then stood up. He pulled off his shirt and sat on the edge of the bed.

He internally smacked himself when Jae inhaled sharply. Oh, well. Another piece for Jae’s puzzle. Yoochun wasn’t going to help him finish it.

“A bad situation, huh?” Jae whispered as Yoochun settled himself on the bed, facing away from him. The blanket settled over his body, Jae’s hands laying it in place.

“Yeah.”

Yoochun didn’t actually think he’d fall asleep again, but he was tired, and Jae’s body filled the bed with warmth. The smell of food woke him up. He rolled over, and then frowned when he realized he was alone. He heard deep breathing, so he propped up on his elbows.

Jae, shirtless, doing sit ups. God, those abs. He looked away quickly, blushing, feeling for some reason, like he’d been staring at something he shouldn’t have been. It’s not like he’d never seen pictures of Jaejoong topless before. Magazine articles with centerfolds of him were published all the time. There was something different about seeing it in a magazine and seeing it clenching and sweating and tightening and … Yoochun sat up quickly. Breath gasping.

“Morning,” Jae said, the word separated in his breathing.

“Morning,” Yoochun muttered.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, just hungry.” He stood up when he was sure he wouldn’t embarrass himself and went to the small table covered in food. His stomach growled. It’d been a long time since he hadn’t been hungry.

He stuck to kimchi and rice, and then tried the meat.

Jae stood up and Yoochun watched him stretch out of the corner of his eye.

“I’m going to go shower and then we’ll take off, alright?”

Yoochun looked over at him, the question in his eyes. Who was this guy, and why the hell was he being so nice?

Jae smiled. “No, I’m not going to just leave you here. I told you I was going to Seoul and whenever you want out or if I start to annoy you, then I’ll drop you off.”

“I doubt you’ll ever annoy me,” Yoochun said and turned back to the food. He ate a lot more than he probably should have, but it felt so good to have a full belly for once. He went back to bed, laid on his stomach and listened to the shower run. He let his imagination wander into that shower and then abruptly cut it off when the water stopped.

The door opened, and Jae laughed. “You asleep again?”

“No. Just resting.”

Yoochun didn’t look over but heard the rustle of clothes, the clink of a belt.

“Hey, Yoochun. I’m not going to pry or anything, but those welts look a bit painful. I have some lotion here that should help if you’ll let me put it on.”

Jae said it all in a rush. Yoochun finally looked at him. He was holding a bottle of lotion.

“It has aloe in it. It’ll help heal them faster.”

When Yoochun still didn’t respond, Jae smiled. “Nothing sexual, mind you. I just want to help.”

Yoochun held his eyes for a long time. It was hard to trust him, hard to trust anybody, but he reminded himself that Jae had already taken care of him last night, getting him to bed, and he hadn’t touched him or hurt him.

Yet.

No, he didn’t seem the type, unless you were going up against him in a business deal.

Yoochun looked away. “Yeah, okay.”

He smiled when Jae sighed in relief. He bent his arms and put his hands under his chin. The bed dipped. Yoochun turned his face away, and bit his lip at the first touch of Jae slippery hands. The moved quickly, and just once, on a welt near his shoulders, did Yoochun jerk and wince with pain.

“Yeah, that’s a bad one,” Jae said and lessened the pressure on it.

Yoochun took a deep, calming breath when Jae’s hands slid along his sides and then only for a moment on his lower back.

“You should put some on your chest, too,” Jae said and climbed off the bed.

Yoochun took a deep breath. His back already felt better. He laid there for another minute and then rolled over. Jae had left the bottle on the bed. Yoochun watched him, as he folded clothes and repacked his suitcases. It was almost like he was avoiding looking at him. Not that Yoochun didn’t understand. He sat up and then spread lotion on his chest.

As soon as he pulled his shirt on, Jae asked, “You ready to go?”

“Yeah.”

Jae did a quick scan of the room to make sure he had everything. Yoochun hefted his bag to his shoulder.

“Traveling light?” Jae said.

“This is all I own,” Yoochun replied.

Jae frowned.

Yoochun grinned. “Trust me. It’s better than what I left.”

“So I saw.”

Yoochun swallowed. “Thank you.”

Yoochun wanted to expand that, tell Jae what his sincerity really meant, but he couldn’t find the words.

Jae seemed to understand though, and he smiled. “You’re welcome. Come on. I want to get to Seoul in time for lunch. There is this amazing restaurant that you’re going to love.”.


	2. Mood Swings

JAEJOONG

An hour into driving, Jae turned to Yoochun and grinned. “You want to drive?”

Yoochun smirked. “No. I’ve never driven in my life.”

“Really? Never?”

“Nope. Not even the getaway car in all the many petty crimes that I’ve committed.”

Jae grimaced. “Look, sorry. I just—I’m glad I was wrong about you, alright?”

“Why set it up though?”

Jae shrugged. “I’m all about making things easier for people.”

Yoochun laughed, and Jae decided that he was going to do everything he could to get him to laugh like that all the time. Something told him that Yoochun didn’t laugh very often.

“I can teach you to drive,” Jae said.

Yoochun’s smile fell and he looked at him. Jae met his eyes, and then concentrated on the road. Yoochun settled deeper in the seat and crossed his arms. “Yeah, sure,” he said, but only just loud enough for Jae to hear.

Jae frowned. What did he say? It’s not like he said, “I’m going to push you out of the car when I have a chance.” How is offering him a chance to learn to drive upsetting? Unless …

He shot a glance at Yoochun’s face again. Anguish marred his features, furrowed his brow and turned his lips down.

He wouldn’t have time to teach Yoochun to drive on this trip. Maybe he’d find a parking lot in Seoul and show him.

Was Yoochun really planning on getting out of the car in Seoul and just saying goodbye, leaving without so much as a, ‘hey let’s be friends’? Jae wanted to keep in contact with him, if for any reason than to just figure him out. There were so many complications behind those eyes and so much pain in that body.

A thought went through his mind so fast and so forcefully that Jae actually gasped and jerked the wheel.

Yoochun grabbed the window. “What the hell was that?”

Jae glanced at him, gasping. “Just seeing if you were paying attention.”

He could tell that Yoochun knew he was lying, but the other man didn’t call him on it.

Jae didn’t want to believe, but everything was pointing right to that conclusion. Yoochun had been a prostitute.

Micky.

All prostitutes had nicknames.

God, and those welts on his back. Fuck. What kind of person would do that to someone else? Jae hoped that Yoochun got paid well for it. The welts didn’t look that old, maybe three, four days, but Yoochun didn’t have any money on him. How much did you get paid for letting someone beat the shit out of you?

Jae clenched the steering wheel, knuckles white, unconsciously stepping on the gas. Uncontrollable rage ripped through him. Anger at the person who would do that to someone, and anger at Yoochun for letting them.

The thought that Yoochun may have had no other choice just made Jae angrier.

“Jae,” Yoochun said and touched his arm.

“What?” Jae snapped, jerking his arm away.

“You’re going really fast.”

Jae glanced at the speedometer. “Shit.” He slowed down.

“What’s wrong?”

Jae’s lip curled. “Nothing.”

Yoochun swallowed and slid over as far as he could. He hunkered down, curled in on himself, further than Jae though possible in the confines of the seatbelt. Who knew though? He may have had a lot of practice being restrained.

Jae tried to calm himself down. These were just his own speculations, for all he knew, Yoochun could have been abused by an angry father, or teacher, or brother, or lover, or anything like that, and just ran away.

Jae didn’t think so. Sure, he’d been wrong to think that Yoochun was going to rob him and leave him deserted, but he hadn’t really believed that. Last night as he went to bed, he knew Yoochun was a decent guy. But something was nagging at him, something he couldn’t quite place. Like a small bit of information that he should have remembered. It felt important, so Jae knew he’d remember eventually.

No matter what, it wasn’t Yoochun’s fault and Jae was pretty sure that he was building a wall between them right now. He took a few more deep breaths, stretched his neck and rolled his shoulders to relax.

“Can I have a cigarette?” Yoochun asked, almost whispering.

“I fucking need one, too,” Jae said and pulled out his pack.

“I’ll light it for you,” Yoochun said, as he took the pack. “You’re still going insanely fast. I want you to concentrate on driving.”

That made Jae smile, and he slowed down more. He watched discretely as Yoochun stuck a cigarette in his mouth and lit it. Instead of lighting a new one off that one like Jae would have done, Yoochun pulled the smoke from his lips and then leaned over the console. Jae was about to reach for it, but Yoochun put it right to his lips. Jae opened his mouth a bit, and almost lost the cigarette when Yoochun’s thumb swiped along his jaw as he withdrew his hand. He took a deep drag.

“Thanks,” he said, blowing the smoke from his nose.

Yoochun lit his own cigarette. “Thanks for sharing with me. I’d like to say I’ll pay you back, but—”

“They’re just cigarettes, don’t worry about it.”

“They’re just cigarettes until you can’t afford them.”

“Point.” Jae thought for a minute about what it would be like to not be able to afford a cigarette. He shivered.

“Not a comforting thought, huh?”

“No.”

They drove in silence for almost another hour. The only time Yoochun ever reacted to anything was when a song came on the radio that he liked. He didn’t sing, but he’d smile and keep time with his fingers on his knee. Music was something they could maybe have in common.

Now that Jae had his suspicions, he was more determined than ever to make friends with Yoochun. He wouldn’t just toss him into Seoul with no where to go.

“I love this song,” Yoochun suddenly said.

Jae reached for the dial and turned it up.

“I’m all by myself,” Yoochun said, pronouncing the English perfectly. Right on key, he sang, “You’re my heartbreaker.”

Jae laughed and joined in and rapped the whole thing with Yoochun. Yoochun was actually dancing, bouncing in the seat and doing the arm movements of the dance.

“You’re my har har har har heartbreaker.”

On the last verse, Jae dropped his voice and harmonized with Yoochun. He raised his eyebrows in surprise and kept singing.

“Wow,” Jae said when the song was over. “You’re a good singer. Natural talent?”

Yoochun shrugged. “Yeah. I always sang well when I was little.”

“Mine’s a mixture. I had voice lessons up until I was eighteen.”

“Your voice is pretty.”

“Thanks.”

After commercials, Call Me from the popular singer Taegoon came on. They sang this one too, and Yoochun’s voice was damn near perfect. The last stretch of their trip flew by as they sang practically every song that came on the radio – even the ones by the female artists. They were still singing a song by the duo Davici when Jae pulled into the front of a hotel. They sang to the end of the song and then met each others eyes and laughed.

Yeah, Jae was determined to do everything he could to keep Yoochun laughing.

Yoochun looked out the side of the car, and Jae watched as the smile fell, the look darkened.

“Let’s go check in,” Jae said. “And then go to lunch. I’m starving.”

Yoochun met his eyes. Jae kept his face as blank as possible, and then he smirked. “I told you this morning that I was taking you to lunch, remember? Now, come on.”

He climbed out of the car. The valet bowed. “Welcome back, Kim Jaejoong-shi.”

“Thank you, Seunghyung. This is my friend Park Yoochun. Make sure he’s treated well.”

“All of Kim Jaejoong-shi’s guests are treated well,” he said and bowed to Yoochun. “Welcome, Park Yoochun-shi.”

“I just have a couple bags,” Jae said. “It’s going to be a short stay.”

“Yes, sir.”

Jae smiled at Yoochun. He almost held his hand out and then just started walking. Yoochun fell into step beside him. They were bowed through the doors, and then when they were in sight of the front desk, the hotel manager came over and started bowing and posturing. He handed Jae a keycard from inside his jacket pocket and then Jae waved him away with a thank you. He went to the elevator, and a bellhop followed them in.

When the elevator opened, Yoochun muttered, “Top floor. Shocking.”

“Hey, it’s one of the perks.” Jae opened the door and walked into the sitting room of the suite. The bellhop immediately took the luggage to the bedroom and then came back out. Jae tipped him, and then the door shut.

Jae sat in a chair, crossed his legs and watched Yoochun. He’d gone to the middle of the room and stood there, looking at the pristine cream furniture. The windows over looking the city. The fireplace. The small kitchenette.

“There are two bedrooms,” Jae said. “A master suite with its own bathroom, complete with a jetted tub and then a smaller room through that door. There’s a jaccuzi on the balcony and an office complete with its own computer set up. Any questions?”

Yoochun met his eyes. “This place is bigger than the apartment I shared with four other guys.”

“Do you want me to apologize?”

Yoochun scoffed. “Of course not. Just an observation.”

Jae stood back up and when he was sure Yoochun was watching him stalk over to him, he let his eyes wander the length of his body. He was skinny, but Jae was sure it wasn’t in a healthy way. When his eyes finally met Yoochun’s again, Jae was no more than a foot from him. Yoochun’s eyes were wide, they had this wild air and Jae knew he was on the verge of bolting.

“One issue,” Jae said and reached for Yoochun’s jacket.

Yoochun’s eyes shut and he took a deep, stabilizing breath, like he would take whatever Jae did to him without a sound.

And Jae confirmed his earlier thought, and that illusive bit of information crashed over him.

Micky.

He knew that name.

He swallowed and if his voice came out a bit huskier than he wanted it, then that was fine. After that look, Yoochun would think it was just desire. “The place I want to take you for lunch has a dress code, so you’re going to have to borrow some clothes.”

Yoochun’s eyes flew open, wide with the question.

“Suit jackets required,” Jae continued. He put both hands on Yoochun’s shoulders, carefully, and then nodded. “We’re about the same size. Let me show you what I have that you’ll look ravishing in.”

Jae turned quickly and walked toward the bedroom. He waited a few steps and then turned back. Yoochun hadn’t moved. Jae frowned and then said, “If that makes you uncomfortable, we can just call room service.”

Yoochun visibly shook himself and then smiled. It didn’t quite reach his eyes though, and Jae wondered at the thoughts in that head. “No, sorry. It’s just … overwhelming, I guess.”

“I’m not going to put you in a full tux,” Jae said and headed to the bedroom again. This time Yoochun’s footsteps followed him. Jae opened his suitcases and pulled out all the clothes. He only had one sport jacket in there. He frowned and then went to the closet. Good. There were a few outfits left from when he was here last month. He brought over a blue and a black jacket. He was going to wear the gray one.

“Here,” Jae said and handed Yoochun the blue one. “Put that on.”

Yoochun did and then Jae straightened it, took advantage of this moment to touch Yoochun’s shoulders and arms. Then he buttoned the two buttons and stepped back and looked at him. He grinned. “Almost perfect. If there was time, I’d have it tailored to fit you correctly.”

“Feels like it does.”

“My shoulders are a bit broader than yours, so it doesn’t quite fall right, and you’re just a smidge taller than I am. I hope the pants look alright.”

Jae pulled out a pair of dark wash jeans and then a green button up shirt. “Here, put these on. I have to go make a phone call, but come out when you’re done.”

Jae left without seeing if Yoochun would comply.

He went to the other side of the sitting room and called his best friend.

“Joongie-ah,” Lee Donghae answered.

“Hey, Fishy. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Your business a bit lighter yet?”

“Thanks for being tactful about it, but no. Not until tomorrow. I’ve only got a few seconds to talk, but I have a question for you.”

“Go ahead.”

“What’s the name of that prostitute you’re so addicted to?”

Donghae laughed. “Wow. That’s random.”

“Yeah, I know. But I can’t remember and it’s bugging me and you know how I get when I can’t remember something.”

“Yeah. The word is obsessive. His name’s Micky.”

Yoochun exited the room and Jae’s mouth went dry. Those jeans accented his thighs and his tiny waist and that green shirt made his skin deepen and his eyes practically glow.

“Fucking sucks, though,” Donghae said.

“Huh?” Jae couldn’t stop his eyes from roving that body, even when Yoochun blushed and looked down.

“I called for him last night and was told that he ran off. What the fuck? Who am I going to have sex with now?”

Jae shut his eyes. “Try your wife.”

“Jae.”

“Sorry. I have to go.”

Jae disconnected and then said to Yoochun, “Yeah, that will work. Let me go change and then we’ll leave.”

“You okay?” Yoochun asked.

Jae was still breathing heavily. “Yeah, just some bad news. I hate being right.”

YOOCHUN

Jae slammed the door. And Yoochun winced. He tugged on the sleeve of the jacket again. He wondered about what business brought Jae to Seoul, and wondered about all the looks Jae kept shooting him. He dismissed the lust-filled ones, there was no way a guy like Jae would be attracted to him. It was the frowns and the anger and the crassness that bothered him. He thought, hoped, they weren’t directed at him, but Yoochun couldn’t tell. One minute the man was smiling and the next he was slamming doors.

Yoochun headed to the balcony. He didn’t go outside but looked out over the city. He swallowed. Seoul was huge. Busan was big, but Seoul. He’d heard from some of the other guys about Seoul and the money that could be made up here, but Yoochun didn’t want to do that anymore.

How was he going to survive in this place?

“Deep thoughts?”

Yoochun jerked in surprise and then looked over at Jae. He’d changed to a pair of dark slacks, a shirt that wasn’t quite pink, and a gray sports coat. He looked good.

“Seoul is huge,” Yoochun said.

“Yep. Come on. Let’s go eat.”

“And now you’re in a good mood,” Yoochun muttered.

“What?”

Yoochun shook his head. “You have crazy mood swings.”

Jae frowned at him for a moment and then smiled. “Yeah. I know. All my friends tell me that you either get used to it, or you end up hating me.”

“I’ll get used to it then.”

Jae’s smile widened. “Good. And here I thought you were going to run off on me.”

Their eyes met. What did that mean? Jae gave him a ride up here, was taking him to lunch and then that was it, right? Well, he’d have to come back to return Jae’s clothes, but then what? He had to find somewhere to stay the night.

“Stop thinking,” Jae said, and headed to the door. “Look, I know what’s going through that head of yours, but don’t worry about it. At least not tonight. You can stay here. Fuck, Yoochun, this is my suite, you could live here if you wanted to. It’s not like I’m here all the time.”

Yoochun swallowed and followed after him. In the elevator, he crossed his arms and didn’t look at Jae. Live there? Was he kidding?

“Hey,” Jae whispered.

Yoochun made a noise to show he was listening.

“Just stay tonight okay? Really, no obligations or anything. I just … well, if you leave then I won’t know where you’re at and that scares me.”

“You have a hero complex.”

Jae chuckled. “Maybe. Please.”

“We’ll see,” Yoochun said.

The elevator dinged open. Jae led the way and smiled at the hotel staff who continually bowed to him. The doors were opened before he got there and outside at the curb was a black town car. Seunghyun opened the back door and Jae climbed inside, Yoochun after him.

Jae told the driver the name of the restaurant and they pulled away from the curb.

“Why am I surprised that you have a driver?” Yoochun asked and smiled at him.

Jae shrugged. “I get whatever I want, and sometimes what I don’t want because people think I want it.”

“You don’t want a driver?”

“I have a car, but this is his job. If I didn’t do this, then he wouldn’t be able to feed his family.”

“You don’t have to save everybody.”

Jae met his eyes. “If I don’t do everything I can for everyone I can, then I’m just another rich bastard.”

“Some people are going to look for hidden motivations in your actions though.”

Jae smiled. “I know. But whoever those some people are should realize that there aren’t any.”

“Someone with hidden motivations would say that.”

“You have a really hard time trusting people, don’t you, Yoochun?”

Yoochun looked out the window and didn’t answer. The car stopped. The driver opened the door for them and bowed them out. “Thank you, Jonghoon. We should be done in a couple of hours.”

“Yes, sir, Kim Jaejoong-shi.”

Jae walked up a set of stairs. A young woman opened the door and preened and smiled and flaunted over Jae. He took her hand and kissed it. “YooJi, how nice to see you. I know I didn’t call, but do you have a table for two?”

“For you, Kim Jaejoong-shi, of course.”

Jae stepped into the restaurant, and then stopped in his tracks. Yoochun almost ran into him. He looked past Jae to a taller man. Very good looking, short brown hair. A scantily clad female clung to his arm. He met Yoochun’s eyes for a brief moment, a sneer curling his lip.

“Joongie,” he said, but when he took a step forward, Jae took a step back, and into Yoochun. Out of the other man’s sight, Jae’s hand reached for something, so Yoochun took it, holding it between their bodies. Jae squeezed hard.

“Yunho,” Jae spat out.

Ah. That explains it.

“Oh, you don’t seem happy to see me.”

“Not particularly.”

“Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”

“No.”

Yunho smiled and then met Yoochun’s eyes. “I’m Jung Yunho. And you are?”

There was another squeeze on his hand. Yoochun leveled his stare at him, but didn’t say anything.

“Shame on you, Jaejoong. Your boyfriends are usually more well-behaved than this.”

“Until they go off and fuck everything with breasts.”

The girl simpered and giggled.

“Lovely as this is,” Jae said. “We’re going to be seated, and Yunho, don’t come here again. You may not find the wait staff so willing to let trash into their restaurant, and I don’t mean the girl.”

He turned a full watt smile to Yoochun, one that Yoochun could tell was fake, and then told the hostess to seat them. He didn’t look at Yunho again. Yoochun did though, and the man glared at them as they walked, still holding hands, to a table. It was a booth actually, secluded so they faced away from the rest of the dining room. Yoochun slid into the booth. Jae sat back with his eyes shut, breath gasping.

“Can you really get him banned from here?”

A smiled played at Jae’s lips.

“One of the perks, I take it.”

After another minute of silence, Jae squeezed his hand. “Thanks,” he whispered, “for backing me up.”

“Sometimes heroes need a bit of help.”

Jae laughed and finally let go of his hand. “Let’s get some food, yes?”


	3. Hurt

**YOOCHUN**

Jae stalked through the suite, took the sport coat off and flung it into a chair. He threw himself into the other one, leg over the arm, head back.

“Oh, fuck,” he said, drawing the word out as he stretched.

Yoochun took the jacket off and laid it across the back of the arm chair. He picked up Jae’s discarded one and did the same. Jae had been distant during lunch, disturbed. More than once, he’d trailed off in the middle of a story. Yoochun didn’t pry, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out that those stories were about that man Yunho.

Jae sighed and stood up quickly. “I was hoping to not have to see that bastard until tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

Jae waved the question away. He untucked his shirt, and undid the buttons, ripping a couple of them. The shirt landed in a heap on the floor.

Yoochun stopped breathing, eyes glued to Jae’s body. This time he was caught staring.

Jae smiled at him and turned away. “I’m going to have a cigarette.” He flung the balcony door open, looked over his shoulder and said, “Well, come on.”

Yoochun stood there a moment longer and then went outside. The afternoon air was crisp. Not appropriate for no shirt. The balcony itself was large, stretching the length of the suite and then to the edge of the roof. There was a patio set up, a few couches, a fire pit, and the jaccuzi. Jae went to railing. He flipped open the pack and then cursed.

“There’s only one left,” he said, but pulled it out and lit it. He took a drag and then handed it to Yoochun. They smoked in silence, looking out over the city.

Yoochun was again assailed by how large it was. He had no idea where to start or what to do or where to go. He thought leaving Busan was his only option, but now he wondered how good of a choice it had been. Certain people in Busan would have taken him in. Maybe. But then again, if he stayed in Busan, it would have only been a matter of time before Junsu found him.

Jae turned around and leaned against the railing. Close. Jae laid his arm along the railing and over Yoochun’s arm. Yoochun moved it, but had no place to put it. Around Jae’s waist would have been nice. He swallowed, and then Jae handed him the cigarette again and he took it with that hand.

“So what are you going to do?” Jae asked.

Yoochun had no answer.

“Something else?” Jae offered.

Yoochun cut his eyes to his and swallowed. Jae met his stare unwavering, and Yoochun had a sinking suspicion that Jae had already figured out what he ran away from.

“Definitely something else,” Yoochun finally replied and looked away.

“Will you stay here tonight? Please.”

Yoochun didn’t look at him, felt his eyes on the side of his face. He took another drag on the cigarette. He wanted to stay. His life was so uncertain now. Staying meant that Jae would be a part of it. It didn’t make sense, he hadn’t even known Jae for an entire day.

But he knew himself. He hated to be alone and if he left, he’d be alone. He’d have to leave tomorrow. He should have left before Jae took him to lunch where the food cost more money than he had ever been able to call his own.

He should have left last night when Jae was still sleeping.

Alone. He hadn’t been alone for so long. On the rare occasions he didn’t have a job, he’d sit up and wait. Look out the window. He couldn’t sleep, or do anything those nights, alone, aching, until the boys came home in the morning.

The thought of his dongsaengs still in Busan made his heart ache. He’d abandoned them. And now one of them was going to have to take his place, keep the clientele happy. The thought of Onew, Minho, Taemin, and Jonghyun at the mercy of Junsu made his throat close up.

And he’d left them there. Left them to their fate because he’d been too cowardly to protect them.

He turned his face away from Jae and gasped.

Selfish was what he was. Selfish. He should have stayed. They were his brothers. He was supposed to care for them. How many times did he hold Taemin until he cried himself to sleep? How many encouraging words did he have to lie to make them feel like they would all have a chance to make something else of their lives? How many wounds did he have to heal, physical and mental?

Guilty tears fell down his cheeks. If anything he should have stayed for them. Not run away.

 _Selfish_.

“Yoochun,” Jae whispered.

He jerked away from the touch on his shoulder. His knees gave out and he sat hard on the ground, hands grasping the cool metal of the railing.

Hands tugged on his arms and he let go, too weak to fight. Strong arms pulled him and he succumbed to their comfort, burying his face in Jae’s neck. He cried and forced himself to think of Onew’s perfect smile beaten away, Minho’s welt ridden back, Taemin’s pretty features destroyed and Jonghyun’s body on display for whoever wanted it. The images got worse, the scenarios more awful and violent and bloody and …

Yoochun broke away from Jae, crawled towards the door and just made it to the trash can before throwing up his lunch. Jae wasn’t far behind, arms and legs encircling him again, holding him, rocking him until his sobs turned to heavy gasps and he had no more tears to cry.

“I just left them there,” he muttered.

Jae held him tighter. “I’m sure they’ll—”

“Don’t you dare say they’ll be okay,” Yoochun snarled, flinging himself away. He was still too weak, but Jae let him go. “You have no idea.”

“Tell me.”

Yoochun met his eyes for a moment. He took a deep breath and stood, using the wall to support him. “They won’t be okay, and it’ll be all my fault and—” He broke off with an anguished gasp. He fumbled with the door, finally wrenching it open. Stumbled on the frame. His vision blurred. The bedroom door slammed open. He shoved his clothes into his bag, forgetting that he was wearing Jae’s.

“What are you doing?” Jae asked.

“I can’t just leave them,” Yoochun muttered. “I have to go back.”

He ignored Jae’s gasp. Zipped up the bag.

Jae slammed the bedroom door and stood in front of it. “Fuck, no, you’re not going back.”

“Move.”

“No.”

“Fuck you, Jae. I shouldn’t have even gotten in your car. I shouldn’t have left. Get out of my way.”

“You can’t.”

“The rich man says no, guess I’ll do what he says like everyone else.”

“I’m not saying this for my own personal gain,” Jae said, eyes narrowing. “You need to think about this.”

Yoochun didn’t want to touch him, if he touched him, he wouldn’t leave. And the only way to get out the door was to move Jae away from it.

“Need I remind you of what your body looks like right now?” Jae whispered.

“And he’s probably doing worse to them because I’m not there,” Yoochun shouted. He dropped his bag and put his face in his hands. “God, I didn’t even think about them when I left. What would happen to them. What he’s doing to them.”

“And how is going back going to help them, huh?”

“You don’t understand.”

“No, I don’t, because you haven’t told me. Tell me.”

Yoochun turned away from him. A few more tears dripped down his face. “Just let me go, Jae.”

“Think long term, Yoochun. Come on. There’s a budding business man buried in you somewhere. Going back would just mean a temporary fix, but not going back and trying to make something with your life and bettering your life means that you’ll get to better theirs and get them out of whatever situation it is that they’re in.”

Yoochun shut his eyes. He knew Jae was right, but how was he supposed to better his life when he had no job, no education, and the only way he knew how to make money was to sell himself? And how could he just leave them to that life?

Arms wrapped around him from behind. He leaned into Jae’s body.

“Please don’t leave,” Jae whispered. “Remember what you said to me, you can’t save everybody, right? Well, you also can’t save anyone until you save yourself.”

Yoochun collapsed again, turning in Jae’s arms and gasping, crying. He barely noticed when Jae lowered him to the bed, but then thankfully everything went black.

**JAEJOONG**

Yoochun’s body went limp. Jae panicked, laid him flat, and didn’t breathe until he saw Yoochun’s chest rise and fall with irregular breaths. He rubbed his face in his hands. Forget making sure that Yoochun laughed more; Jae had to worry more about making sure he didn’t go back to Busan. Jae understood though. If Yoochun felt obligated to go protect who Jae could only assume were Yoochun’s dongsaengs, it’d be tough to keep Yoochun here.

Jae sighed and undid the buttons on Yoochun’s shirt. It was going to be his now. Jae never looked that good wearing that shirt. Each button revealed another fading stripe of red skin. He didn’t understand why someone would do something like that to someone else. He manipulated Yoochun’s arms and managed to get the shirt off. He reached for the belt buckle and then stopped. Something told him that Yoochun would freak out if he found himself naked when he woke up.

Yoochun jerked suddenly, a small sound escaping his lips, but he didn’t wake up. He thrashed for a moment and then curled in toward Jae’s body, hand falling on his leg. He visibly settled.

Jae smiled, eyes trailing over his body. Yeah, he was skinny and needed to eat more, but he had muscles on him. A single red welt wound onto his side. How hard of a strike would that had to of been? Did Yoochun take this beating silently, or cry out, or scream? Did whoever did it tell him he deserved it?

Red hot fury raced through him, and he clenched the blanket in his hands.

If Donghae—

Jae stood up and left the room. He found his phone in the jacket pocket and dialed Donghae’s number.

“Wow, two phone calls in one day,” he said with a laugh. “You feeling okay?”

“Did you hurt him?” Jae asked, voice low.

“What? Did I hurt who?”

“If I find out that you hurt him—“

“Woah, Jae. What are you talking about?”

“Micky. Did you hurt him?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“Just answer, Hae, because if I find out that it’s you who put those welts on his back then I’m going to fly down to Busan and kick your ass.”

“Welts? Jae, how do you—” Donghae stopped and then said, “He’s with you, isn’t he? That’s why you called earlier.”

“And I’m going to ask again, did you hurt him?”

“No. God, Jae, you know I’m not like that during sex. Wait, aren’t you in Seoul? He’s in Seoul?”

“Yeah, I saw him walking on the side of road last night and picked him up.”

“I promise, Jae, that no, I did not hurt him. I’d never hurt him. If he wasn’t a whore, I probably could have loved him, but you don’t fall in love with prostitutes. If you’re going to threaten anyone, go after his pimp, Xiah.”

“Xiah?”

“Yeah. Every now and then when Micky would come over, he’d be a little beat up. It took a while but Micky started telling me about Xiah. I’m sure that if Xiah knew that, he would have killed him.”

“You know his name isn’t Micky?”

“Yeah, I know. But he never told me his real name, even when I asked.”

“When he wakes up and if I find out you’re lying to me—”

“Damn it, Jae, when have I ever shown any interest in beating people?”

“People have secrets.”

“I guess you won’t believe me until you ask him, though, huh?”

“No.”

Donghae sighed. “Is he okay?”

“Not really.”

There was a noise from the other room.

“I have to go,” Jae said and headed to the room.

“Wait,” Donghae said quickly. “Tell him … well, give him a hug for me, yeah?”

Jae scoffed and disconnected.

He opened the door. Yoochun wasn’t in the bed. Jae covered the floor like he had flown and found him curled in a ball between the bed and wall. His body shaking, eyes staring at nothing.

“Chunnie?” Jae whispered and dropped next to him. Yoochun didn’t fight him when he pulled him into his arms. Jae knew that no words of comfort would help. He held him for almost an hour, and then said, “Come on. Let’s get you into a warm bath or something.” Jae helped him up, but Yoochun stumbled and fell to the bed pulling Jae on top of him. Their bare chests pressed together. Jae’s face was at his shoulder, and Yoochun’s harsh breathing pulsed on his skin. Jae stayed there in muted shock until Yoochun moved, foot sliding up the back of Jae’s leg. Jae gasped, and then rolled away and sat up.

“I’m going to go fill the tub up for you. Are you hungry?”

“No,” Yoochun whispered, voice harsh.

“You should eat. At least some rice.”

“Okay.”

Jae entered the bathroom and closed the door. He leaned against it, breath gasping, rubbing hands on his chest, trying to rid himself of the feel of Yoochun’s skin on his. Not like this, not with him so vulnerable. Enough people had taken advantage of him, Jae wouldn’t be one of them. And he’d only known Yoochun for a day. One day! Why had he attached himself so quickly to this poor soul?

Maybe because he knew what it felt like to have your world ripped out from under you.

Thoughts and memories of Yunho and some girl in THEIR bed played through his mind again. Sure the situations were completely different, but Jae knew what it was like to be lonely. To go from sharing a bed with a warm body every night, to cold sheets and nightmares and never being warm enough.

Jae pushed away from the door and started the water in the tub, making sure it was piping hot. Yoochun needed to relax as much as possible. He splashed cold water on his face,  
made sure that he could bury whatever emotions, thoughts and feelings he had toward Yoochun, and then opened the door.

Yoochun was as he left him, half lying on the bed, feet on the floor.

“The tub is full.”

Yoochun turned pained eyes to him.

“It will help you relax. I’m going to go order some room service.”

Jae left the room, Yoochun’s eyes following him out. He didn’t breathe until the door was shut. He ordered some food and a couple packs of cigarettes.

When the food arrived, he forced down what he could, leaving a small pot of rice and kimchi for Yoochun.

Jae eyed the mini bar, but he couldn’t get drunk tonight. His mind had to be clear for the meeting with Yunho and his lawyers.

And he had to keep his mind out of that bedroom. Out of that bathroom. Out of that bathtub. Alcohol would not help with that.

Jae went to the other room, grabbed the iPod from the charger and popped in the ear buds. He went back to the sitting room and paced, feet keeping time to the pop and R&B and rock music playing in his ears. After another hour, Jae checked on Yoochun. He’d expected the other man to come out and eat, but wasn’t utterly surprised when he didn’t.

Jae stopped in the doorway, breath gasping again. He shut his eyes.

It’s not Yunho. It’s not Yunho, he repeated, and then opened them again.

Yoochun was on the bed. He wore a pair of sleep pants. Green with bold white and gray lines. A pair that Jae had forgotten about. They had been Yunho’s. Jae’s throat closed and he had to take a few deep breaths before he moved to the bed.

Yoochun feigned sleep, his breathing a bit too irregular. Jae sat on the other side of the bed. He flipped on the TV and leaned back to watch a movie. A few minutes later, Yoochun shifted, his foot pressed against Jae’s calf.

They didn’t say anything.

After the hours ticked by, Jae set the alarm for six. He turned the light off and then climbed under the covers. Only moments later, the other side of the bed shifted.

“Jae?”

“Yeah.”

“Thanks.” And then a pair of shaking arms wrapped around his middle.

 _Not a good idea_.

Jae didn’t care. Yoochun stopped shivering and his breath steadied when he was being touched or held. And it felt nice to be held. Jae shifted against Yoochun’s body, settling into his warmth.

He knew the moment that Yoochun fell asleep.

For now that was enough.

Jae woke up alone, but he wasn’t cold so Yoochun hadn’t been up for long.

The bathroom door opened. Yoochun walked out, fully dressed and then cursed when he saw Jae awake.

“Sneaking out?” Jae asked, propping up on his elbows.

“Not anymore.”

Jae stretched. It was five am. “You couldn’t have waited until the alarm went off?”

Yoochun moved swiftly to the bedroom door, and Jae had to scramble to intercept him. Yoochun opened it just as Jae grabbed the back of his jacket. Yoochun jerked out of the hold, and Jae slammed the door.

“Please, Yoochun,” he said, “just don’t go back there, okay? I won’t keep you here, but don’t go back.”

“I have to.”

Jae made a noise of defeat. “Why?”

“What else is there for me, huh?”

Jae stopped himself from saying something stupid. Something revealing with words that were supposed to mean something that he couldn’t mean after only knowing the man for one day.

Maybe …

Instincts.

Jae pushed him up against the door, pressed his body into Yoochun’s. He forced his legs open and when Yoochun’s hands grabbed his forearms, Jae struggled with him, until he had Yoochun’s hands pinned above his head. Jae trailed hot breath up Yoochun’s neck. His head hit the door with a moan.

“I know what you’re going back to,” Jae whispered, lips just barely not touching Yoochun’s ear.

Yoochun whimpered.

Jae pulled his face back far enough to look at his face.

“Tell me, Micky, how many times has Lee Donghae been balls deep in your ass?”

Yoochun’s body stilled, his eyes flew open.

“Donghae and I have been friends since we were thirteen. When you said your name was Micky, I had a feeling I knew someone by that name. I called him to verify it and to make sure it wasn’t him that was taking a whip to you. Trust me when I say that I would have hurt him if it was. Remember that I live in Busan. And if I can find out who he is, I’m going to destroy Xiah.”

Yoochun gasped.

“Look, I know you’re worried about your dongsaengs, your friends, but damn it, Yoochun if you go back then you’re tossing away this chance. Everyone deserves a second chance. Everyone, and this is yours. If you don’t want to let me help you, then fine. Go walk around the streets of Seoul for a few days. Without anything or anyone behind you, you’ll just end up the same way but in a different city.”

Yoochun had started crying again, silent tears dripping from wide eyes, body limp against his.

“I will never, ever know what if feels like to sell myself just to survive, and damn it, Yoochun, I don’t want you to have to feel that again either. I’ll help you if you’ll let me.”

Yoochun’s eyes closed. “Let me go. Please.”

Jae sighed. He released Yoochun’s arms and stepped away. “Fine. But just remember that your name is not Micky, and you are not Micky.”

Jae turned around and headed to the bathroom. The bedroom door closed and he jerked like he had been struck.

“Nothing you can do,” Jae said, and repeated it again and again while he got ready for his day.

When he emerged from the bedroom, that air of cool, collected business air around him, he could almost pretend that Yoochun’s missing presence didn’t hurt. Pain didn’t lash through his heart and down his limbs.

And then Jae stopped. On the back of the chair was Yoochun’s tan hoodie. And a note:

 _I stole your cigarettes_.


	4. Phone Calls

**YOOCHUN**

As the elevator doors closed, so did Yoochun’s throat. Damn it! He would not cry! He’d barely known Jae for a day and he refused to admit that in that day Jae had become important to him.

He swallowed. Before the tears fell, the elevator stopped. Yoochun stepped into the lobby, and headed toward the doors.

“Good morning, Park Yoochun-shi,” the hotel manager said.

Yoochun returned the greeting and the bow.

“Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No, thank you. Just going to take a tour of the city.”

The manager bowed again. “We were not aware that you were leaving. Let me call a car to—”

“Um, no.” Yoochun shut his eyes in annoyance and suddenly knew what Jae meant about getting things that he didn’t necessarily want. “I’ll walk. Thank you.”

“Of course, Yoochun-shi.” He reached into his jacket pocket. “If you need anything, or you need a driver for any reason, you call me, okay?”

Yoochun took the offered card and stuck it in his back pocket. “Yes, I will. Thank you.”

He had to go through the same thing with the valet.

When he finally did get away from the hotel, he stopped on the corner, jostled by all the people. He had no where to go. So he walked.

The tears fell unrestrained.

 _Your name isn’t Micky_.

Being Micky was all he knew. Yoochun stayed locked away, but with Jae, Jae had freed him for a moment. He had laughed, he had smiled.

And he hadn’t had sex in three days. How weird was that? The last time he’d had a dry spell was when he caught the flu for four days.

The press of Jae’s body mocked him.

His stomach grumbled. God, he should have gotten something to eat before he left. All he had in his pockets was a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

Yoochun lit a cigarette.

Jae’s cigarette.

When he left, he just knew he had to get away. Running again. Running from Kim Jaejoong. A lot of people that were going to tell him he was being stupid. And maybe he was, but …

Why had he left?

I won’t keep you here, but just don’t go back.

Yoochun forced himself to think about Junsu. About the Junsu he’d first met when he was a lonely kid on the city streets, running from an abusive uncle. A stranger, older than him, giving him food and money and a place to stay. The first kiss came two weeks later. The first blow job and fucking not long after that. And then the first beating. Sex and pain became one in the same and then within a year, Junsu was selling him to other people.

For a long time, it was better than what he left at his uncle’s.

Always running. He was always running.

But he had loved Junsu. Loved him with all of his heart and everything he did was for Junsu. A part of him would always crave Junsu’s smiles and words of encouragement and praise. And sometimes he needed the discipline, the correction, the whipping.

He shivered as a memory of a whip ghosted along his back. He would never forget that, the anticipation and pain and begging.

Sometimes, he was going to need it again.

Yoochun finally stopped walking and leaned against a wall. Eyes shut. Breath harsh. He forced himself to remember every beating, every stripe of pain, every “take it and like it” that fell from Junsu’s lips.

This last beating wasn’t the worst he’d gotten. But it was Junsu’s voice, still breathless from sex, saying “I love you, Micky.” Junsu had stopped calling him Yoochun so many years ago. He wasn’t Yoochun to the man. Just something to beat and fuck.

And Junsu had only tied him up when he felt like it. That night hadn’t been one of those nights, so body shaking, when Junsu got up to shower, Yoochun dressed and left.

He lit another cigarette. This pack wasn’t going to last him long. Pushing away from the wall, he almost collided with other pedestrians. He blended back in to the flow of people.

Again he thought of his dongsaengs. They had all been out on jobs that night. It was no wonder that he hadn’t even thought of them when he left. But he thought of them now. This time not with pain but with determination. Jae was right about that. Going back to Busan would only be a temporary fix. They’d all still be under Junsu’s power, all still broke, broken and loved only by each other.

What was love anyway?

Did he really love those boys, or was it more of a need to protect them, watch over them? But wasn’t that part of love?

For the first time in a long time Yoochun thought of his parents. Was that love? He remembered them fighting. Cuddling with his brother, stomachs growling, as they argued and argued, but then smiled and hugged and kissed.

He hadn’t called his mom in years. Damn it. He should have while he was with Jae. Jae would have let him make an international call.

His parents probably thought he was dead.

He wondered if his father cared. He had been the disappointment. His brother had stayed in America, he’d been sent back to Korea.

If he hadn’t been a disappointment before, he was now. There’s no way that he’d ever tell his mother about his current career.

_Without anything or anyone behind you, you’ll just end up the same way but in a different city._

Jae had said he hated it when he was right, and Yoochun understood. He hated it when Jae was right, and so far, Jae was always right.

Yoochun smiled. Except for thinking that Yoochun would steal his stuff.

In Busan, Yoochun would have. In Busan, if he had access to all of that and hadn’t brought it back to Junsu, Junsu would have taken it out of his blood.

True, what Junsu didn’t know, didn’t hurt him. He had a lot of chances to rob Lee Donghae, but never had. That man genuinely cared about him, and Yoochun had thought of going to him first when he ran away.

But Donghae had a wife and a little boy, and how would that be to have your husband’s male prostitute show up on your door asking for shelter from a psychopath.

And then to have your savior be the most gorgeous man in Korea driving a blue sports car. It was all so surreal.

Just because it feels surreal, doesn’t mean it’s not real.

Yoochun found himself in a city park. He picked a spot of grass with no trees above him and lay down. The autumn air warmed as the time slipped by. Yoochun may have slept, he may not have, nothing made sense in his mind.

He smoked cigarettes.

_I’ll help you if you’ll let me._

_Your name is not Micky._

_Everyone deserves a second chance_.

**JAEJOONG**

Jae sat at the conference table, Yunho across from him. Both surrounded by a team of lawyers. They never broke eye contact.

Jae listened, but only enough to make sure his lawyer said what he was supposed to say and not inadvertently hand half his company over to the treacherous ex-partner.

Life with Yunho had been surreal. A man who loved him, a gorgeous man who loved him, and it was so easy to fall in love. To drop his walls and let him in to his home and business and heart. Coming home to him in bed with a woman had been even more surreal.

Yunho’s lawyers refused to budge from their terms.

Jae’s lawyer leaned in, whispered something about making negotiations here. Jae gave him a look that said _are you fucking kidding me?_  
  
The truth was that in his usual state of mind, he could have negotiated and reduced their demands and had them leaving thinking they’d won, but Jae was not in his usual state of mind.

Yoochun was his state of mind.

After the lawyers exchanged a few more words, Jae stood up.

“See you in court,” he said with a grin to Yunho.

“Any chance I can talk to you alone?” Yunho asked, returning the smile.

Jae didn’t reply, but when his lawyer leaned in and said it wasn’t a good idea, a streak of rebellion ran through him. Yeah, it wasn’t a good idea. He held up a hand.

“You have five minutes.”

They stared at each even after the lawyers had shuffled out. He hadn’t been alone with Yunho in a very long time. That day, he told Yunho he had a half hour to get his shit and get the fuck out, and then any and all doors were closed to him. The hardest part was that Yunho led and controlled about ten of his companies. Everything was thrown on hiatus. It was after security had to physically remove Yunho from a building that Jae received the lawsuit papers.

He hadn’t been all that surprised.

“You’re wasting your time,” Jae noted with a look at his watch.

“Can’t I enjoy looking at you?” Yunho asked.

“Pick up a magazine.”

“I still miss you sometimes.”

Jae scoffed.

“No, I mean it.” Yunho stood up and walked around the table as he talked. “You were always good to me, and I took advantage of that. Of course, I knew I was doing it because honestly, Jae, outside of the bedroom, I never loved you.”

“So I noticed.”

Yunho stopped right next to him, leaning against the table, arms crossed. “You’re damn good at sucking cock. Is that why your new boyfriend is with you?”

“Unless you’re prepared to drop this ridiculous claim on my businesses for one of my fantastic blowjobs, I suggest you change the subject.”

“Still easy, huh? Maybe when this is over I can give you a pity fuck or something because I feel bad for taking all your companies.”

Jae rolled his eyes. “Please.”

“You do know that we’ll file a motion to keep personal lives out of the courtroom.”

“I don’t need your infidelity to win.”

“We should just settle this here.”

“Then lower your demands.”

“I never did in the bedroom, why should I now?”

“Do you honestly feel like you deserve a quarter of my company and holdings?”

“And investments. Yes, I do. I helped you gain them.”

“You were my partner for less than a year. I’ve been doing this since I was eighteen.”

“And in that year, your company grew by a quarter.”

Jae rolled his eyes. “Save what money you have.”

When Jae turned around to end the conversation, Yunho grabbed his arm and pulled their bodies together. “Things were good between us. Hot, intense.”

Yeah, they had been. They had been crazy intense, and the best sex Jae had ever had in his life.

Yunho’s hands clutched his ass and he thrust against Jae. Yunho was hard and for once, Jae was glad that disgusted him.

“You miss us,” Yunho said.

“You better let me go or you’re going to have harassment charges to fight off.”

Yunho laughed, but released him. “I love it when you think you’re in control of something.”

Jae left the room. His lawyers filed along behind him. When his head lawyer started talking, Jae held up a hand. “Send me an e-mail.”

Once in his limo, he opened the small fridge, took out a tiny bottle of something and downed it.

“Don’t go back to the hotel yet,” he told the driver.

“Where to then?”

“No where. Just drive around the city for awhile.”

“Yes, sir.”

If Jae was honest with himself, looking for Yoochun was the plan, but as stop lights came and went, and pedestrians shuffled past, the empty feeling in his heart expanded.

He drank another bottle.

His phone rang; he ignored it. It rang again. This time he looked at the display. Donghae.

“What?” he snapped.

“Hey,” Donghae said, carefully.

“Seriously, what do you want? I’m not in the mood for idle chitchat.”

“Just breaking news on the television is all. Jung Yunho declaring to all the media that you’re holding his companies hostage and internal negotiations have failed, and so he’s taking you to court.”

Jae shut his eyes. “Fucker.”

“Yeah, really, tug at your heart strings bullshit. Your relationship has already been mentioned and he’s pulling the ‘I don’t know what happened’ crap. I called to see how you’re doing.”

“Miserable, Hae, just absolutely miserable.”

“There’s more to that than Yunho being a jack ass. What’s wrong?”

Jae sighed. “He left.”

“Who left?

“Micky left.”

“What? Where?”

“God, Hae, I don’t know. I just really hope he didn’t go back to Busan.”

“Let me give you a bit of advice,” Donghae said. “Some info from someone that knows Micky pretty well. He’s quiet, he’s reserved and he thinks a lot. It’s an interesting twist of life when you can be as smart and talented as that kid is and still end up being a whore. Does he know where you are?”

“For now.”

“What do you mean?”

“I have to make sure all my international holdings are running smoothly. I’m going to Beijing tomorrow, then New York and Chicago.”

Donghae was quiet for a moment. “And if he comes back?”

Jae scoffed. “He won’t.”

“He might.”

“He won’t.”

“Look, Micky hates being alone, and if you’re someone that he knows and trusts then he’ll come to you.”

“I’ve known him for two days, Hae.”

“So maybe not, but—”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore, okay?” He pulled the phone away and told the driver, “Take me to the hotel.”

The driver nodded.

“Are you drinking?” Donghae asked.

“A little bit.”

“Just make sure it stays a little bit, okay?”

“God, Hae, I have to get out of here. First flight to Beijing is what I need. I don’t want to wait until tomorrow.”

“Bury yourself in business. That was always your motto.”

“What the fuck am I supposed to do? Run around the streets of Seoul screaming his name until I get picked up by the police? I don’t know where he is, he doesn’t have a phone, he didn’t tell me where he was going?”

“Do you want me to come up? I can be there in four hours.”

It was tempting to say yes, but Jae shook his head. “No. I have to go.”

He disconnected, and then called his secretary. The next flight to Beijing was in four hours. He told her to book him a first class flight.

He drank another bottle.

When he arrived at the hotel, he ignored everyone. The alcohol spread through his body quickly. Light headed, unsteady, he fumbled with the key card, and then stumbled into the suite. He called down to the front desk .Words very carefully enunciated, he scheduled a driver to take him to the airport and for a wake up call in two hours.

Steps jerking, he grabbed Yoochun’s jacket and then collapsed onto the couch. He clutched the jacket tightly, brought it to his face and inhaled Yoochun’s smell. The room swam. He curled in a ball. Vision misty with tears.

Yunho leaving him hadn’t hurt this much.

God, why did this hurt so much?

“Please, Chunnie, just don’t go back,” he whispered to the empty room.

**YOOCHUN**

With a sigh, Yoochun tossed away another cigarette.

He sat on a park bench, watching people go by. He wondered idly if he had a huge neon sigh flashing _Former Ho_ above his head. More than one guy had carefully appraised him from across the street. Then he figured that the bench he was sitting on was probably a _if you want me, you can have me_ bench.

Yoochun stood up.

The wind picked up, and he rubbed his bare arms. He was one of the few without a jacket. He’d made his decision hours ago. There wasn’t much of a decision to make. He had no choices, no prospects. And an offer of help was still an offer no matter who it came from.

Sure there was a chance that Jaejoong was a psychopath who would take him to a basement and chain him up with all his other possessions, but Yoochun highly doubted that.

A nice looking girl sat on a small wall, eating a sandwich. He bowed and apologized profusely and lied and said his phone was dead, and asked to use hers for just a moment. He shot her his disarming smile. She grinned back and actually agreed.

Yoochun dug the card out of his back pocket and called the manager at the hotel.

“Ah, of course, Park Yoochun-shi. I was expecting your call. Where are you?”

Yoochun had no idea so he asked the girl, who told him.

“That’s not far at all. I can send a driver, but it may be faster to just walk.”

The manager gave him directions, which he wrote down on the back of his hand with a pen borrowed from the girl.

“Thank you,” he said and returned her phone with a bow.

The walk back to the hotel only took him fifteen minutes. He smiled, realizing that subconsciously, his feet had led him in a circle around rather than a straight line away from the hotel.

“Ah, welcome back, Park Yoochun-shi. Did you enjoy our city?”

Yoochun smiled. “It’s big. I got a bit turned around. Thanks for giving me your card.”

“Anything for one of Kim Jaejoong-shi’s guests.”

“Is he here? I forgot to grab a room key.”

“Yes, but I don’t know if he’ll be awake. Let me get you a key. Will you be leaving with him?”

“Leaving?”

“To the airport. He’s going to Beijing today.”

“Oh, yeah. That,” Yoochun said, and panicked inside. “No, but he’s not gone yet?”

“No, sir." He handed Yoochun a keycard, and Yoochun fled to the elevators. At the door to the suite, he paused with the card a few centimeters from its reader. If Jae was leaving today … he wasn’t even going to wait to see if Yoochun came back.

_Well, you didn’t exactly leave with the intention of coming back? Why would he stay?_

And now Jae was leaving, wouldn’t it have been easier to just leave now, never see him again? Yoochun’s heart constricted.

 _No, no. Your lack of options doesn’t change_.

He slid the key in.

Jae was on the couch, one leg on the floor, one arm dangling. He had Yoochun’s jacket clutched tightly in his other hand.

Yoochun swallowed, feet leaden as he made his way to the couch. He kneeled down. Jae shifted in his sleep. A wave of alcohol drifted to him. Yoochun smiled. Jae missed him, missed him enough to get drunk and cuddle up with his jacket.

Yoochun tugged on the jacket. Jae’s eyes flew open, but he tried to roll at the same time and fell off the couch into Yoochun and sent them both to the floor. Yoochun gasped, eyes shut. Jae’s gasps echoed in his ear.

“Yoochun?”

Jae shifted and propped himself up.

“Surprise?” Yoochun said with a grin.

Jae made a noise of disbelief and then kissed him. Yoochun gasped. Soft lips, incessant pressure, and then a swipe of a tongue on his lower lip. Yoochun moaned and melted into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Jae’s body. Jae tasted like alcohol and something sweeter, almost like chocolate.

Jae broke away. “Don’t ever, ever, ever do that again.”

“I won’t. I just had to think about some things.”

“You weren’t coming back.”

“Not at first, but someone, an incredibly smart guy, once told me that everyone deserves a second chance.”

“You forgot gorgeous,” Jae said with a smile. “Incredibly smart, gorgeous guy.”

“You must still be drunk,” Yoochun said with a laugh. He laughed harder when Jae frowned. “Yes, incredibly gorgeous,” he replied and ran his hands up Jae’s sides.

Jae kissed him again. Yoochun met each tangle of tongue eagerly and arched into Jae’s body. The phone in the suite rang, and Jae jerked away. It silenced.

“You’re going to Beijing,” Yoochun said.

“I have to,” Jae said and rolled off him to sit up. He still had the jacket in his hands. With a smile, he asked, “Do you have a passport?”

“No. “

“That’s alright. I can get you one in a few days.”

Yoochun’s eyes went wide. “You want me to come with you?”

“Of course.”

Jae stood up when the phone rang again. He answered it. “Actually,” he said never taking his eyes from Yoochun, “cancel that. Beijing can wait a few days.” He hung up, called his secretary and canceled the tickets.

He walked back over, helped Yoochun off the floor and hugged him hard. “You do know that psychologically speaking, this isn’t a good idea, right? I’ve known you for two days.”

“Jae, my head is so messed up right now that I doubt this will have a huge impact on it.”

Jae laughed and kissed him again. His hands roved up Yoochun’s back as his tongue reached for the back corners of his mouth and throat.

“Come on,” he said, tugging at Yoochun’s shirt. “Let me take care of you.”

Yoochun stopped with a gasp.

Jae looked back at him.

“Don’t say that,” Yoochun whispered, voice harsh. Junsu always said that to him, before the beatings, after the beatings.

Jae bit his lip, opened his mouth to say something, and then nodded. “Okay. What can I say?”

Yoochun swallowed.

“How about we don’t talk?” Jae said and licked his lips.

“How about we order lunch?”

Jae frowned, pulled Yoochun next to him, arms around his body. “What’s wrong?”

Yoochun squirmed but didn’t try to get away.

“You’re going to have to talk to me, you know,” Jae said with a smile.

“I know.”

“Fine. I’ll order lunch, but I plan on kissing you until it arrives.”

“That’ll be okay.”

Jae leaned in for another long kiss and only pulled away when Yoochun’s stomach growled. He ordered, did as promised and then wouldn’t let Yoochun anywhere near the food and fed him noodles and pieces of meat, kissing him after almost every bite.

When the last bite was swallowed, Jae asked, “What should we do now that you’re fed? There’s a Jacuzzi that needs to be used, a jetted tub in the bathroom and two beds, not to mention the amazing comfortable chair in the office.”

Yoochun winced. “Sleep?”

“Tell me why that instead of everything else, and then yes.”

Yoochun pushed Jae far enough way that he could put his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.

“Chunnie?” Jae said after a long moment. A hand rubbed his back.

“What is this then?” Yoochun said. “I just … It’s hard, I still feel like … like …”

“A whore?”

Yoochun scoffed.

“You aren’t though.”

“Aren’t I?” Yoochun met his eyes. “You’re going to help me, and what exactly do you get from it? Seems like it’s an exchange of services to me.”

Jae’s eyes narrowed. “That’s not fair to you or to me.”

“It’s how I feel.”

Jae shook his head. “I’m not going to force you to fuck me and I won’t have you doing anything with me because you feel obligated. I like you, Chunnie. Is part of it some fucked up need to help you? Yeah, but some incredibly smart guy once told me I have a hero complex.”

Yoochun smiled. “You forgot the good looking part.”

Jae laughed and stood up. He held out his hands. “I know you’re dealing with a lot of issues right now, but please let me help you. For now, let’s go to sleep, wake up for dinner, sleep some more, go shopping tomorrow, waste some time, and spend the next few days getting to know each other. Sound good?”

Yoochun smiled and let Jae help him up. “Yeah,” he said and kissed Jae softly. “That sounds great.”


	5. Strength

**YOOCHUN**

“Would you calm down?”

Yoochun smiled and shook his head. “Sorry.”

“It’s not like you’ve never met Donghae before.”

Yoochun rolled his eyes. He took a few deep breaths, but continued to tug at the sleeves of his sport coat. Living with Jae the last two months had been a definite improvement on his life. Nice clothes and good food had done a number on his body. The constant attention and praise Jae laved on him did a number on him mentally. Jae was helping him go back to school so he could get a job.

They’d been back in Busan for two days. Jae had business meetings and then after dealing with what Jae called “a personal insult”, they were going back to Seoul.

After dinner, of course.

“Jae, I can’t do this,” Yoochun said, nerves picking up again.

“Calm down. His wife is gone, he’s alone, a situation you should be familiar with.”

“I especially can’t do this if you’re going to be making jokes about it.”

Jae laughed and kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry. I’ll be good.”

Yoochun grunted. The last time he’d seen Lee Donghae, the man had pinned him up against the front door, too eager to move to the bedroom.

Jae pulled his car up to a familiar gate, entered a code that Yoochun had memorized and drove down the cobbled driveway to the gorgeous, three-story home beyond. He parked at the edge of the circular drive and turned the car off.

Yoochun let out a deep breath.

“One more thing you should know,” Jae said while opening his car door. “I didn’t tell Donghae you were coming.”

Yoochun stared at him, open mouthed and then climbed out of the car. “What do you mean?”

The side of Jae’s lips quirked in a smile. “I thought it’d be more fun.”

“I am not going in that house.”

“Oh, come on. Stop acting like a child.”

“Says the man who thinks my emotional turmoil is entertaining.”

“What? I do not. Although I don’t understand why this is so emotional for you. Donghae likes you, you know. And more than just something to shove his dick into, which he is totally not allowed to do anymore.”

Yoochun smiled and shook his head. He leaned against the car, but when Jae held out his hand, he sighed and took it.

“This is part of my past,” Yoochun whispered, as the walked up the front path. “Just being in Busan is hard.”

Jae squeezed his hand and placed another kiss on Yoochun’s cheek. He rang the doorbell, and Yoochun fidgeted in the ten seconds it took for footsteps to sound on the other side and for the door to fly open.

Yoochun’s heart leaped and he fought back a grin.

Donghae was adorable. Short brown hair, playful dark eyes. He wore a nice set of a slacks and a button down blue shirt. Donghae’s mouth, usually turned in a smile, was open in shock.

“Micky,” he whispered.

Yoochun inhaled sharply, that name taking away any good feeling he had. No one had called him that for two months.

Jae’s hand tightened. “Um, I think you’re mistaken, Hae,” Jae said with a smile. “This is Park Yoochun.”

That smile came back. “Park Yoochun, really?” Donghae said and held out his hand. “It’s good to meet you.”

Yoochun stared at the hand for a moment, and then shook it.

Donghae tugged, and Yoochun stumbled and found himself wrapped in a hug, body frozen.

“Finally,” Donghae whispered in his ear.

Yoochun had to take one more deep breath, and then he returned the hug.

“Alright, alright,” Jae said. “My boyfriend, if you’ll remember.”

Donghae leaned back, but didn’t let Yoochun go. “Sorry,” he said, staring at Yoochun. “You look good. God, your eyes are gorgeous. And your body, I mean, you’ve always had a nice body, but you’ve got some muscle on you now.” Donghae squeezed his arms, pulling their bodies closer.

Yoochun blushed.

“Hey,” Jae said, this time pulling Yoochun away from him. “Hands off. Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea.”

Donghae laughed. “I’ll be good, I promise.”

“You were always good,” Yoochun said, but looked away.

Donghae laughed more and Jae started pulling him back to the car.

Yoochun resisted and said, “Hey, Mr. Business Man, this was your idea, not mine.”

Donghae grabbed his other hand and pulled back. “Oh, Jae, come on. You know I’m good, too.”

Yoochun raised his eyebrows at Jae. “You never told me about that. What happened to honesty in all things?”

Jae smirked. “What?” he demanded. “Donghae is gorgeous. But I at least I had sex with him before he was married.”

“And I didn’t have to pay for you.”

Yoochun gasped.

“Eh, sorry,” Donghae said quickly.

“It’s okay,” Yoochun said. “I wouldn’t have charged you if I didn’t have to.”

Donghae smiled and touched Yoochun’s cheek. “I would have paid you more if you had let me.”

Yoochun leaned into it with a sigh. “I know.”

“Come on. Dinner was almost ready, but now I have to add food for a third person.”

Donghae didn’t let go of Yoochun’s hand as they walked into the house.

Yoochun took a deep breath, remembering the first time he’d been taken there. Donghae had picked him up, much like Jae had, just to drive him somewhere, but back then Yoochun had no problems at all throwing out hints to what he would do. Donghae hadn’t even hesitated.

The only reason Junsu allowed him to continue to go to Donghae was that after realizing Donghae was rich, Yoochun charged him double, claiming it was his regular rate, and he never once complained.

Yoochun felt bad about it now. It’s not like he ever saw any of that money.

He sighed.

“You okay?” Jae asked.

Yoochun grinned. “Yeah. It’s just weird to be in this house and have clothes on.”

**  
JAEJOONG**

Jaejoong needed a cigarette. Needed badly.

Not a good time for it. He hadn’t been this nervous since the judge had made his decision about Yunho’s lawsuit. Of course, Yunho had no case. The companies he had been running while Jae’s partner all had to be redone and revamped and fixed after he left. All ten of them had disappointing quarters.

No, he amended. This was worse than that day.

Yoochun leaned against the wall next to him. Only his breathing proved he was even there.

Jae was glad again that he’d taken Yoochun to dinner at Donghae’s. Yoochun had been incredibly nervous about coming back to Busan and what they had to do tonight. After the initial awkwardness at Donghae’s, Yoochun had relaxed and smiled and laughed. It was a relief, especially now because if they ever saw Donghae at a business function it wouldn’t be awkward.

They both kept their eyes on a second story window across the narrow street. A light was burning, shadows moving. When a man briefly walked through their line of vision, Yoochun gasped. His hand grabbed Jae’s shoulder. Jae moved back and let Yoochun lean on him.

“That’s him.”

Like Jae couldn’t have guessed.

Kim Junsu looked like he had been hot once. While his shoulders still held muscles, his stomach was going, and as Jae watched the man chug a bear, he knew why. He wore only sweat pants. His eyes were cold and calculating. As Jae thought about what this monster had done to Yoochun, what he was doing to those other boys, he snarled.

Yoochun chuckled, low and it vibrated down Jae’s skin. Jae shivered. Yoochun’s other arm snaked around his waist and pulled their bodies closer. Jae leaned his head on Yoochun’s shoulder.

“Not the best place for cuddling,” a voice said practically in his ear.

They both jumped.

“Damn it, Changmin,” Jaejoong said. “Warn a guy.”

“I wouldn’t be doing my job if you knew I was coming.”

Jae smiled.

Shim Changmin was his best private investigator. Best at resolving issues. If you knew who Changmin was, or who Changmin worked for, you were either Jae or you were Changmin. Or you were really good at hiding. Well, and now Yoochun. Not that Jae told him what Changmin’s job description was, but Yoochun was smart and figured it out on his own.

Jae had been alone in one of his offices one day, and then suddenly Changmin was there, a gun in his face, telling him about the work he did for his father and the secret compartment he could find all the information in.

“I’m here so you don’t have to pull the trigger,” is first thing Changmin had said to him.

It had been an interesting job interview.

The only setback to Changmin was his height. He managed to stand out wherever he went. But he had an honest face and eyes that made even the most closed-mouthed person start talking.

“All four boys are in there. One is currently unconscious in the bedroom.”

Yoochun made a noise of distress.

“He has one gun that he keeps loaded and is on the side table where he’s watching TV.”

“There’s one in the bedroom closet too,” Yoochun said.

“He’s not going to have time to get to it.”

The arm around Jae’s middle tightened and Jae prepared himself for the inevitable question.

“Are you going to kill him?”

Changmin looked at Jae. Jae met his stare. After a silent minute, Yoochun said, “Please don’t.”

Jae turned around in his arms. “You do remember who we’re dealing with, right? Who hurt you? Who is hurting them? He deserves it.”

“And,” Changmin said, “if he doesn’t do it to them, he’s going to do it to others.”

“I know,” Yoochun said, “but—” He made a strangled noise.

Jae hugged him close and then whispered, “I know that you love him, but he’s dangerous.”

“No, Jae. Let the police handle him.”

Jae looked over at Changmin, who was shaking his head in disbelief. “Okay, Yoochun. No bodies.”

A wicked grin morphed Changmin’s face. Changmin had only gotten that command twice in the seven years he’d worked for Jaejoong.

“Thank you,” Yoochun muttered.

“Do it,” Jae said.

And Changmin disappeared.

They waited the allotted five minutes, and then headed to the apartment. Yoochun clutched at Jae’s hand. They had talked this over for the last three weeks, and Yoochun promised him he’d be alright. Now Jae wasn’t so sure. It’d been two months since Yoochun left, and ever since they stationed themselves in Yoochun’s old neighborhood, he had been jerky and twitchy.

“You don’t have to do this,” Jae whispered.

“Yes, I do.”

They moved up the rickety stair case. A square of dim light fell onto the hallway from the open door.

As they got closer, Changmin’s voice said, “You reach for that gun and I’m going to pull this trigger. Put your hands on your head and stand up.”

“Who are you? What do you want?”

Yoochun whimpered.

“Chunnie, be strong. You understand me,” Jae whispered harshly. “Be strong.”

Yoochun took a deep breath.

“Stand up,” Changmin said again. “Good.”

Their cue. Jae stepped into the door. Yoochun right behind him.

“Micky,” a young voice said in disbelief. Jae didn’t turn to it.

Junsu snarled at him. “You little traitor.”

Changmin pressed the gun harder against his temple. “It would be a good idea if you shut the hell up.”

Jae smiled. “Well, well, Xiah. Finally, we meet.”

“Who are you?”

“You don’t know?” Jae tsked. “You need to get out into the real world a bit more often, Kim Junsu.”

“What do you want?”

“You to stand there and shut the hell up.” Jae smiled at Yoochun. “Go ahead.”

Yoochun moved past him to the three boys huddled on the floor and gave them all hugs and kisses. “Where’s Taemin?”

“He’s hurt.”

Yoochun nodded. “Okay. Go get all your stuff. We’re getting out of here.”

“Really?” another asked.

Yoochun smiled. “You think I was going to abandon you here? Yes, really. Come on. I’ll get Taemin. Just pack what’s yours, okay? We’ll get everything we need later.”

“They’re mine,” Junsu snarled.

Yoochun turned and for the first time met Junsu’s eyes. “You can’t own someone, Su,” he whispered and stood up.

He went into Junsu’s bedroom. And then there was a sudden intake of breath, almost a whimper, and then nothing but the rustle of clothing as the boys scrambled around and over each other gathering things. Jae wanted to go make sure Yoochun was okay. Finding one of your brothers unconscious and injured on a bed couldn’t have been easy.

Yoochun emerged, face pained, carrying a bundle wrapped in a bloody sheet. Legs and arms hung limp from it, but the face had been covered. Dried blood caked the skin.

“He’s alive, but barely” Yoochun said.

“Get him downstairs.”

“Come on, guys,” Yoochun said and led the boys out of the apartment.

“I won’t forget this,” Junsu snarled. “You traitorous bastard, Micky. I hope you find a hiding spot because I’ll come and find you and then you’ll all die.”

Changmin hit him in the back of the head. “I thought I told you to shut up.”

Jae waited until all the footsteps on the stairs faded.

“You’re a bastard, Kim Junsu-shi,” Jaejoong said with a head shake, “but hey, we’re both business men. I don’t want to leave you completely uncompensated since I just took your livelihood away.”

Jae reached into his jacket pocket, pulled out a pair of black gloves. After putting them on, Changmin reached into his pocket and threw a brick at him. Jae caught it, and then tossed it from hand to hand. Junsu’s eyes went wide. Yep, just what Jae wanted him to believe. There was cocaine in it, but not much. Selling shit like this on the street would get someone killed.

Perfect.

“Sell all this and I’m sure you’ll be able to make enough money until you can manipulate other boys to serve under you.”

Jae set the brick down on the side table. He turned around and then smirked over his shoulder. “I’ll leave Changmin here to go over the details with you.”

Jae left the apartment and headed down the stairs. The quite _flltt_ of a silencer was followed quickly by a deep thud.

One less bastard in the world.

**  
YOOCHUN**

Yoochun carefully rearranged the blankets around Taemin’s sleeping body. They had taken him to the emergency room there in Busan, but as soon as he was able, Jae ordered him to be airlifted to Seoul. The doctors held him for three days for observations. The other three boys had been examined in Busan, but besides a few deep welts on Jonghyun’s back, they were okay.

Not one of them could believe what had happened.

They stared in awe at the private jet that took them to Seoul. They stared in awe at the high rise building Jae and Yoochun lived in. They stared in awe at the two-story condo with its rooms and TVs and two kitchens! None of them were quite comfortable with the fact that they had their own rooms, and every night, Yoochun found them curled up in one bed together.

After the first night, he smiled at Jae and said, “I told you they only needed one room.”

“No,” Jae said, “they need their own rooms, but it’s up to them if they want to use it.”

The cuts on Taemin’s face had been superficial, the ones on his back stitched up. His internal injuries were the worst. Of everything Yoochun had seen, walking into the room and finding Taemin covered in blood and come with a bat shoved … Yoochun swallowed the taste of bile and took a deep breath.

 _Taemin is okay now. He’s okay_.

Just to be sure, Yoochun touched his cheek again. He kicked off his slippers and lay down, holding Taemin’s hand. In his sleep, the younger boy shifted toward him.

Seeing Junsu, facing him was probably the hardest thing Yoochun had done in his life. Well, maybe second. Leaving in the first place had been more difficult. Junsu was his life, his purpose, his heart.

 _And he betrayed and hurt you and almost killed Taemin_.

Even reminding himself of that didn’t make the feelings go away. It wasn’t the same love that he felt for Jae. Hell, the love he felt for Jae was more confusing than the love he felt for some sadistic bastard. But at least Jae never hurt him.

“Mic—sorry, Yoochun.”

Yoochun turned and wasn’t surprised to see Jinki (formally known as Onew) at the door.

“Um, is it okay if we sleep in here tonight, so Taemin isn’t alone?”

“Of course.” Yoochun said.

Jinki came forward and was followed quickly by Jonghyun and Minho. Yoochun didn’t give up his position next to Taemin. None of the boys were certain where to go, Jonghyun holding onto Jinki and Minho holding onto Jonghyun.

“Just come on,” Yoochun said.

Jinki climbed in on the other side of Taemin, followed by Jonghyun. Minho nervously moved beside Yoochun. Yoochun held his arm out and Minho settled against his side.

“There you go.”

Silence settled, and Yoochun listened to them breathe. None seemed too relaxed. And Jinki kept shoving Jonghyun in the ribs.

“Um, Yoochun ,” Jonghyun said.

“Yeah?”

“I lost the paper, rock, scissors game, so I have to ask you something.”

Yoochun grinned and looked over at the boy. “I’m not going to like this question, am I?”

Jonghyun met his eyes for a brief moment and then mumbled something.

“What?”

“We want to know why you left,” Jinki demanded.

Yoochun sighed and looked at the ceiling. “Cowardice.”

“No,” Minho said. “You were always brave.”

“And I couldn’t take it anymore,” Yoochun said.

“It was brave to leave.”

“It was foolish,” Yoochun said vehemently. “I left you there.”

“But you came back,” Jonghyun whispered. “We never thought we’d see you again.”

Yoochun held Minho more tightly with one arm, and then draped his other arm over Taemin to Jinki’s body. Jonghyun’s hand was there and he grabbed it. “I’m sorry that I left you there.”

“Thanks for coming back,” Minho whispered, and it was echoed by the other two.

The tense energy in the room dissipated. Minho was the first to fall asleep. And then Jonghyun started snoring.

Jinki kept his eyes on Taemin, the youngest of them all.

“I did my best,” he said, “after you left. But—”

“Don’t blame yourself for any of it,” Yoochun said. “I had to learn that. Jae had to teach me that. You held yourselves together.”

“We hated you for leaving,” he whispered.

Yoochun nodded. “I hated myself for leaving, too.”

Soon Jinki fell asleep. Yoochun stared at the ceiling. Both arms were numb. His legs twitched because he needed to move them, and Minho drooled on his chest. He smiled.

Jaejoong found him there a couple hours later. He leaned against the door jamb and grinned.

“You didn’t tell me I’d have some competition for your affections,” he said.

“A smart guy like you should have seen it coming,” Yoochun replied.

“You always forget the beautiful part.”

Yoochun sat up, careful not to jostle Taemin. Minho curled up around him, and suddenly the whole pile shifted and then relaxed again. Jinki was almost buried under Jonghyun’s body and his hand was clutched into the blanket at Minho’s hip.

“Cuddly little things,” Jaejoong said.

Yoochun kissed him. “It’s the touching thing. It reminds us that there are some things in this world that are real and worth fighting for.”

They left the room, leaving the door ajar in case Jonghyun woke up screaming from nightmares again.

“They should go talk to the therapist with you.”

Yoochun nodded. “Yeah. I was going to ask if that was okay.”

“Of course it is.” Jae stopped their progress down the hall and pinned Yoochun to the wall. “They’re your family. And your family is my family.”  
“Speaking of which, have you called your mom yet?”

Jae frowned. “No, and I don’t want to talk about it.”

“In the words of your therapist, your need to protect everyone stems from the fact that you didn’t feel protected or wanted as a child.”

Jae waved him silent. “Yes, yes, doctor. I know. Leave me alone to my issues.”

Yoochun laughed and kissed him. Softly, tongues reaching, and then his body felt that need. It still didn’t happen often, but Yoochun was getting used to this thing called desire. Want. Need. This sharing of something that used to be so impersonal.

Love. Not that the act of sex itself was love, but being with Jae, sharing his body with Jae. Not Jae taking and demanding it, but Yoochun giving it to him. That felt like love to him. Or part of it.

And Jae never pressured him. Never forced him to have sex more than he wanted, and as Jae showed him more and more of what sex could be like, Yoochun was finding it harder and harder to keep his hands to himself.

Yoochun stopped the kiss and smiled at Jae’s confused look. “First, we’re in the hallway and we have four new housemates, so sex wherever is no longer an option. And second, I don’t really think this is the appropriate place for declarations of love.”

Jae’s eyes widened and then he smiled. Jae had told him many times that he loved him, but Yoochun had yet to say it back.

“Love is everywhere,” Jae said. “Love is in this hallway, in that bedroom, in the kitchen where I make you breakfast and where you make me coffee. Love is in the study where you watch me work and in the music room where I watch you play.”

“Yes, but right now, love wants to be naked in our bed with you begging me for more.”

Jae smiled. “Okay. Love can be there, too.”

Jae kissed him again. A kiss that left him breathless and wanting more and more and more. Jae slid a leg between his knees and Yoochun’s head thunked against the wall with a moan.

“That would be my cue to drag you to said bed,” Jae said and did just that.

With clothes discarded and hands and lips and tongues, Jae did in fact beg Yoochun for more. And more and more.

Finally sated, they lay in a tangle of sweaty limbs, gasping kisses and lazy touches.

Yoochun stared up at him, loopy grin, eyes half lidded. “I love you, Jae.”

Jae smiled. “I know. I love you, too.”


End file.
